Question I need help with.

[Indistinguished]

As far back as I can remember I considered my self heterosexual, but there has always been a nagging in the back of my brain things like "oh hes really cute" or similar things at times very explicit. So then I started to worry about being gay, what if I was? Would it matter? But I still had an attraction to females and at one point I read an article that says everyone feels this way at some point its just most choose to be with the opposite gender in the end. So for a while i was comforted by that.

But as of a few months ago I realized my preferences were showing more and more I couldn't stop thinking about guys so much to the point where I was watching gay porn to kind of test the waters. I admit I did freely masturbate to it and in fact still do. But I can not rid myself of my liking of females either though. So by many I have been labeled as bisexual, and indeed it seemed to fit but as I have read more and more literature around the net I get confused. Especially around the bits about not being accepted by either straight or gay people which I have not encountered even once. Though admittedly I have only told one person in real life I say that because I am a computer geek and there for many of my friends are on the net. But I told my best friend who is oddly enough a super christian and obviously hetero which is my exact opposite in every way (I think) though were like brothers and to my surprise he did not care he treated me no differently. Many people online I have told this to had similar responses that he did mainly in the area of "its about time I wondered when you would come out".

So my question is am I bi? I have never had a sexual relationship with either gender though there has been occasions of cams getting involved with both. Is it possible I'm just in a prolonged phase? I'm so very confused on all of this because what I read of the culture doesn't always suit me much like I don't believe in religion but I'm not a big fan of atheists either. I really need help if someone here could guide me a bit please.

[_Joe_]

I would say you're bi. I was there once, getting turned on be the idea of another person, looking at both along the way, etc etc.

Its when you try and make it more complex it needs to be with political correctiveness, religion, and etc etc that you confuse yourself. Keep it simple. You like the vagina and the cock. You admire the beauty of a person despite their sex. You get your rocks off either way, whatever strikes the mood. Embrace how you are and accept it, there's many more mysteries to deal with in life.

Course continuing through life and being comfortable with it will get testing at times, and I don't know if that thought ever leaves "Why can't I be simple like everybody else?!"

[wefco2315]

WOW!!!

So I am not the only one with nearly the same exact thoughts throught out my life...My "urges", desires continue to get stronger as time goes along.

I am at the point of my life I have to know, which is what leads me websites like this. If you have a friend you can share these felings with, without fear of judgement being cast, take advantage of it. I don't have that available to me I have to keep these desires secret from every aspect of my life...

So I am constantly on the chat services and looking through the forums in order to share what I can. But it is not the same...

First thing you need to understand...There is NOTHING wrong with you....no matter how it works out, BI, Gay, Hetero....There is NOTHING wrong with you!!!!

Thanks for starting this forum...It should provide a lot of good advice and insight

[_Joe_]

You'll eventually do what I did, and everyone does.

Find a willing person who is comfortable with it, and take the plunge and find out.

There should be a job profession of people that simply test yoru bisexuality. That woudl be awesome.

* prints business cards *


Self-Discovery-ASSistant

[Indistinguished]

Well there is a guy that I think is really cute but he said and I'm not even sure if it was jokingly that if your bi your greedy you will sleep with anyone. And despite my feelings for females if I go with him I am gay. But yes I prefer the personality over anything else to be sure (though this one guy is an exception because he is more or less a lust thing which sucks because I do not like the idea of sleeping with someone I do not love). But to me friendship and love mean more than anything else period. Bleh I have a lot to think about thank you for the responses.

[csrakate]

Well there is a guy that I think is really cute but he said and I'm not even sure if it was jokingly that if your bi your greedy you will sleep with anyone. And despite my feelings for females if I go with him I am gay. But yes I prefer the personality over anything else to be sure (though this one guy is an exception because he is more or less a lust thing which sucks because I do not like the idea of sleeping with someone I do not love). But to me friendship and love mean more than anything else period. Bleh I have a lot to think about thank you for the responses.
Well..if you ask me, if you have sex with this guy, you are sacrificing a bit of self esteem in order to prove a point. The simple fact that he said "if you're bi you're greedy and you will sleep with anyone" is enough to make him the least attractive person to experiment with. Stay true to your feelings and by all means, don't feel you have to prove anything to anyone...not even yourself.

Kate

[fortiesbifun]

i have always fantasized about guys and oral sex. i had an encounter when i was 15. never got to give, only receive. have thought about itsince. have tried to tell my wife but no luck there. now that sex has gone dry and slow, i am thinking about this every day. the question for me is how to try it? there are too many crazies on CL and that has brought me here. any help would be great. thanks